I've been delving into the murky world of internet forums (I have my reasons) and came across a thread on the modern source of all wisdom (Mumsnet) that began with:

'I realise this is a ridiculous question but I’ve never really ‘got’ yoga. I’ve tried a good 3/4 times with Adriene [the YouTube sensation] and even though I am so keen to love it I just haven’t.

But my question is how should it feel? Just stretchy? There was one pose where I had to hook one knee then put my hands behind it and pull which felt very stretchy in my hamstring but I was a bit like ‘oh is this right?’ - it wasn’t painful just different.'

There isn't anything ridiculous about this question, or the replies to it. In fact, I think this one small corner of the internet succeeds in pointing out many of the conflicting ideas and strange assumptions that are widely (and over-confidently) shared about yoga.

At some point you will probably have been led to to believe that:

1. Taking part will make you a better person

Calmer, happier, disciplined, more compassionate, less angry, with an unrivalled ability to wake-up earlier than anybody else.

2. Taking part will give you a better body

As flexible as a new born baby, as strong as a gladiator, and still pretty damn good looking in your ethical and sustainable underpants.

These beliefs are not really unique to yoga – you only need to dip into the dubious origins of ‘good posture’ and the twisted past of the treadmill to appreciate that physicality and morality have long been intertwined – but they are beliefs that can produce the mother of all guilt trips, plus a whole load of faulty reasons for the things we feel in (and about) our bodies, and how we choose to move them.

I used to think I was ‘really good at yoga’. I knew lots of Sanskrit words, could give you a pretty legit sounding definition of what yoga was, and get my leg around my head. On the flip side, I also used to think I was ‘really bad at yoga’ because I didn’t practise for 90 mins every day, or have much interest in meditation.

After 20 years of personal practice (almost 10 years as a teacher), I’ve come to realise that I don’t really know what yoga is and – knowing a little more about the intercultural, transnational, and historical complexities* – I feel less and less entitled to make a working definition.

I can’t even really answer the forum's question – how should yoga feel? – because:

I don’t know.

It depends.

How do you feel? Is it a feeling you’re willing to tolerate?

Are you enjoying it?

Does it feel helpful?

Do you find it interesting?

Is it worth your time?

Your preferences are reason enough

We learn best (and we move best) when we are given the opportunity to connect with our own experiences, make our own choices, and reserve the right to change our minds.

Seeing as I’ve not been much help in giving you a clear answer, I’ve pulled some comments out of the thread that started this post in an attempt to help you navigate your own very good reasons and avoid the guilt trips. 

Good reasons for taking part in any kind of leisure activity:

'I find it a bit weird tbh but very relaxing.'

'It leaves my mind feeling peaceful and I feel happy for doing something good for my body.'

‘I really feel it if I miss a class, like I'm coiled too tightly.’

Fine reasons for choosing to do something else with your free time:

'I simply have no time for all the 'woo woo'.'

'I've just ended up stressed and grumpy.'

'It really does nothing for me.'

'I never really improved.'

Sad reasons for not taking part in, well, anything you fancy having a go at really:

'I have really ugly feet.'

‘I am just unfit and rubbish.’

If you have any good or fine reasons you would like to add to this list, let me know, or leave a comment. I will happily include them so you can point the person who keeps telling you to try something you don’t want to do to this page.

If you have any sad reasons you would like to add it must belong (or have belonged) to you. I won’t have this category used as a way to guilt trip someone into trying something. If you’ve landed on this page because someone WhatsApped you and was like ‘See! Your reason for not doing x is a sad reason!’; screenshot this bit of the page and send it back to them.

*If yoga history is your thing (or you feel absolutely certain that you know what yoga is and like a challenge), I highly recommend reading Roots of Yoga (2017) by James Mallinson and Mark Singleton. You can dip into Theodora Wildcroft’s round-up of the book’s fraught reception (outside of academia) on The Open University’s Contemporary Religion in Historical Perspective blog. Or skim Matthew Remski’s summary of the keypoints for Yoga Journal.